Estrella's House

Estrella Rojas was only two years old when her life was ended by her mother's boyfriend. (View her story at http://cachidalgo.org/estrellas-house/  ) Formed out of The Children's Advocacy Center of Hidalgo County, one of a larger network of centers committed to protecting children from abuse and neglect, Estrellas's House was established in her memory.  Estrella's House is a safe haven with a child-friendly, non-institutional environment providing a place where young victims can tell their story without fear of repercussion.  Ralph and I recently visited Estrella's House to deliver a small cash donation on behalf of our Telecom Pioneer volunteer organization.

Estrella's house averages approximately 1,000 children per year between the ages of 2-17 years.  To date, their facility located at 525 W. Wisconsin in Edinburg, Texas has served approximately 14,000 children.  Their first year 241 children passed through their doors.

We were greeted by Victoria Medina, Executive Director and Kristy Hallock Meyer, Community Outreach coordinator.   

Left to right:  Diana Garza, Victoria Medina, Ralph Garza, and Kristy Meyer

Kristy graciously gave a tour of their facility whose entrance belies the facilities size.  This June, Estrella's House will celebrate their fourteenth year and will be holding their annual fundraiser February 22, 2014.

The poster somehow didn't show up on my blog.  You can visit Estrella's House on Facebook.

Ralph Garza, Little Estrella's New painting, Kristy Meyer

If you or your employers and/or organization is looking for a good cause to support in 2014, think about supporting Estrella's House.  They're in need of cash donations but you can help also by supplying them with donations from the list below:

The tiny hands in the photo are hand prints with names of the children served at Estrella's House that you'll
find throughout the building.  It's something Estrella's House does to make the children feel welcomed and not feel like they're alone.

Note:  The Telecom Pioneers, are a Volunteer organization and service club made up of US and Canadian telecommunications industry employees and retirees. 

Two great quotes for 2014

“The past is already gone, the future is not yet here. There's only one moment for you to live, and that is the present moment”

― Gautama

"Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results."

Albert Einstein

Yep, 2014 is here!

People were popping what sounded like bombs in our neighborhood last night.  We were over at our forever bff's home, Dee Dee and Leo Rodriguez just down the street from our home.  Just minutes after midnight the lights went out.  We all laughed except for the little ones.  Hearing the loud kabooms and sitting in the dark was scary. Dee Dee and her daughter, Laura, lit candles throughout the house.  I called AEP and was put on hold but a recording said lights were out in Laredo, Mission and in our area in McAllen.  What?!!   Welcome, 2014!!!

But it didn't phase us.  The candles gave the house a glow - gave me the warm fuzzies.  Being together in the "glow"...was priceless!

I was kept on hold the whole time and never got to speak to anyone before the lights came on so Ralph hurried home to check on the pups - we couldn't get inside because with the lights out the garage door does not work.  I left my purse at home and our house keys were in my purse.  Peggy Sue and Sugar were probably terrified because they hate firecrackers and this year's firecrackers were especially loud.  We laughed at ourselves because we normally take the keys to the back entrance for instances such as this one but this time we did not prepare.  Ralph found Peggy Sue and Sugar scared but safe, located  the keys and came back.

We continued celebrating.  And that's when I realized - this was different...

Any other time, I would have been hysterical knowing that my pups were freaking out and I couldn't get to them.  For some reason I wasn't.  I knew they were in a safe place, alone, but safe. Another time and place, I would have rushed home as soon as the lights came on.  I didn't.

Earlier in the day I commented to Ralph that in spite of the fact that we want to change, create change, or encourage change...we still do the same thing.

"Isn't that "insanity,"  I asked him.  "doing the same thing over and over again and expecting change?"

"So what do you think?" I said.  "Changing just a word, a gesture,...a thought - things we do without even thinking,  Think it can make a difference?   Let's try it."

Normally, Ralph will just nod and agree or disagree, depending on what we're discussing...this time he spoke and agreed.

That was different.

But in truth, I didn't notice it...but I think the universe did.

And the changes continued into the evening, at first they were subtle then the differences became distinct.  I was present to the moment.  I felt different.

Oh, JOY!!!!

Ralph and I celebrated by going to mass this morning.  Different from the last few years..

I understood Father Louie - Different!

Prayed for all our family and friends - before recalling was for immediate family and friends  - with so many family and friends on Facebook I am more involved with so many - we're more present to each other than ever before.  Different!

I like this!

I noticed that I write mostly about the past or things I have experienced...I have difficulty writing about something that hasn't happened,  or making it up.  And it hasn't been easy lately but I'm going to try.  I think its because I believed that putting things in writing was just as serious as the spoken word and that kind of power is scary.  The universe is listening...

But I am not alone - I never was - it just felt that way....different.

Am I making sense?

I'm done...for today, anyway.  I'm going to stop now and enjoy the marvelous dinner my hubby is making for us.  I am enjoying my day...present...

2014 is off to a great start...PRESENT!!!

And THAT is a great GIFT!

Sayng goodbye to Sarita and 2013

Yesterday, I said goodbye to a very gentle and beautiful lady, Sarita Balli Hinojosa.  I met Sarita through her husband, Joe, when Ralph and I joined the small church community at Holy Spirit Church over 15 years ago.  Back then Sarita would stand quietly by her husband and listen to our plans to bring in more participants.  Later, Sarita's and my conversations were about our daughters...my Diana and Adri at McHi and her Celestina at Nikki Rowe.  Diana was a Stepper captain, Adri in band, and Celestina was in the Rowe Band.  Both Diana and Celestina would be graduating in the year 2000.  We experienced their Confirmation together and shared a love for crafts.  We would see each other at Holy Spirit Catholic Church until 2006 when there was a big rift in our church and it seemed like we were split in half.  Sarita and Joe continued at Holy Spirit.  Ralph and I started church hopping.

Somewhere in there, Sarita was diagnosed with breast cancer.  I didn't know the severity of her illness during that time because despite her struggles, Sarita blossomed.  Shy, gentle Sarita found her voice and her faith strengthened so that you never saw her sad.  Quite the opposite, there was a peace about her...she knew something so many of us continue to seek.

This year, months would go by and no Sarita...Joe, yes, usually at our local H.E.B. where he would catch us up on Sarita's progress.  Joe was always full of hope...Sarita WAS hope.

Ralph and I got into the habit of going to Adoration on Fridays.  It was on those days Sarita would be heaviest on my mind.  I would offer a rosary for her. But in September my own struggles were overwhelming me and I would think of Sarita and tell myself how Sarita would have a smile for everyone and anyone.  My burden was nothing compared to what she was experiencing.  She had gone into the hospital with a set back but was released after a while.  I wondered how she was doing and the next day at Saturday mass, I saw Sarita and Joe.  Sarita had good news...the doctors saw signs of remission.  I was so thankful, so grateful to God for the good news...but it was short lived.   A few weeks later in October, they told her she had only weeks to live.

I would have crumbled...but not Sarita, "it's in God's hand, and His will will be done."  She continued her battle and I into my silence.  There were no words I could say, nothing would come out.  I admired her strength, her faith, and her love of the Lord.  I could only smile an affirm that she was in God's arms.  She made it through Thanksgiving.  I was glad there was no news.  She made it through Christmas...  What did doctor's know, I thought.

On Friday, December 27th, Sarita took her last breath and joined our Lord. 

This has been so devastating to me on so many levels.  At her services were all the wonderful faces of my community family that was once so vibrant, so alive.  Father Jerry - how I miss Father Jerry - was there to lead her mass.  It reminded me of a painful, yet glorious time of my life when my small church faith community embraced me and saved my wretched soul.  Crawford Higgins, now a deacon, was there yesterday and today, Manuel Mata, my teacher and friend, Olga Serna, who lifted me up when no one could, familiar faces, pillars of my church.  My heart broke in a million pieces at Sarita's service.  I couldn't stop the tears.  But at the end, there was peace.

You see, one year ago today, I lay dying.  I felt my life slipping away and I spent New Year's Eve in the Emergency Room then transported to ICU at McAllen Regional.  I spent New Year's Day and next two days trying to make it back.  I remember that night, my sister, Velma, telling me I was NOT going to die, she wouldn't let me.  But I remember wanting to.  Everything around me was painful, television, the news, betrayal, people suffering, people angry, people hungry, the thought of food and the smell of food making me sick, even hearing music hurt.  I felt this overwhelming evil, I was drowning in fear - it was terrifying.

One whole year...struggling, not to make it back, but to be in a better place.  And here I was, back at Holy Spirit Parish Hall.  It was good seeing my friends - hearing their stories, sharing their faith...I felt home again.  I laughed at myself.  That's what Sarita would say..."Live to the fullest, love much, and laugh often..." 

In September, Ralph and I cut off cable TV,  the newspaper, my only indulgence, Facebook, I can turn off when it gets to be too much.

I don't know why I came to be in this place.  Maybe it was the accident two years ago that took so much from me.  My freedom to move, to dance, to walk freely without pain or maybe because I allowed individuals to take my peace, my inner peace.

Nah...Sarita's journey reminded me it's still here.  Sometimes when I ask God to heal me...the pain ceases for a while and I think it's gone and I thank him.  But then I'll move suddenly throwing off my balance and my pain returns...  But I know others have it worse than I do and they continue to live to the fullest, love much and laugh often. - tell it like it is, Sarita!

Rest in peace, my dear, sweet friend...

Punkin is in a better place...

Punkin

June 4, 2009 - June 5, 2013

Punkin is the sweetest little girl you could ever want.  She's a lap dog...as soon as you'd sit down, she'd be on your lap.  She loves chasing a laser light and fetching her ball.  Everyday has been filled with tears watching our baby suffer.  She has such a will to live...it's been hard.

Yesterday, we had to make the hardest decision we've ever had to make...  She had a large mass that was not allowing her to keep food down - it got so bad she wasn't able to keep water down, either.  But her little body would keep going.  Every morning in spite of her pain she'd be excited to go for our walks...she'd be so sick but she wanted to be with us.  In the evening as soon as it was getting dark she would stand waiting for the laser game to begin.

My little Punkin, our hearts are breaking.  We couldn't see you suffer anymore.  We hope you're at peace, running with Sandy and Keasha.  I love you, my little mighty Punkin.  When my day comes...I hope you'll be waiting for me at the rainbow bridge...because I'll be looking for you.

*     *    *

I've had been taking Punkin to the vets regularly.  Sometimes they've had to do tests so we would have to wait around in the waiting room.  On the south side of the wall, there is a collage of photographs of all the different pets they've taken care of over the years.Well, while admiring all the photos, I found this photograph...I believe it's their parents...I know many of you have been with me since I acquired my puppies, Punkin, Peggy Sue, Sugar and Gracie Lou.  Punkin's and Peggy Sue's parents  were pedigree dogs,  the mother was a Jack Russell and the father was a Fox Terrier.   Combining two pedigrees of different breeds produces what is called a hybrid.  Punkin and Peggy Sue are hybrids.  We used to see their parents in their back yard whenever we'd walk them on the back trail in our neighborhood.  It's been a while since we've seen them.  We've had Punkin and Peggy Sue since they were six weeks old and they turned four years old June 4th. It's been over a year that we hadn't seen their parents.I often regretted not photographing their parents.  They were beautiful dogs.  I believe these were their parents.

This is Jack and Lili..
This is Ralph holding Peggy Sue and Punkin when we first got them.

See the resemblance?...to Lili and Jack...

This is Peggy Sue, Punkin....and Sugar all grown up.

 I don't want to jump to the conclusion that they're no longer with us because we haven't seen them in their home's back yard.  But if they're not...I'd like to think they welcomed Punkin if animals have the same experience as humans.  I hope so...I don't want Punkin to be alone.

My little Punkin...you were such a comfort to me and  a great companion, I miss you so, so much.

I love our dogs...

It's been a while since I blogged.  Truth be told...I find blogging tedious.  Not because I don't enjoy the writing...it's posting it correctly, deciphering the lingo - that's tedious to me.  It totally turns me off to blogging but I do miss it, so here I am.

Most recently Punkin, our little fox terrier, has been very ill.  It's been difficult watching her suffer.  But like any suffering, it makes you reflect.  My reflection took me back to the days when we first were blessed with our tiny companions.  Most friends know this story but just to refresh everyone's memory, this is how it began:

It all started with a conversation I had with my neighbor across the street.  Sandra D, our chow chow, was getting old and I commented to my neighbor that I'd like to possibly adopt two puppies when the time comes  since I noticed Sandra D was alone with no one to play with.  In actuality, I think Sandy preferred it that way; she had us all to herself.

It was just a conversation, but on my brother's birthday, May 3, 2009, while celebrating his birthday at our home, my neighbor shows up with two little black Boston Terrier/Chihuahua mix puppies, now known as Le Suge Avery, (Sugar) and Gracie Lou Freebush (Gracie Lou).  Ralph and I decided to give it a try...they were so cute.  Sugar looked like a miniature lab and Gracie Lou looked like a little graceful gazelle.  The only ones that weren't thrilled were my mom and Sandra D.

It wasn't long (less than two months) that our neighbor tells us about their friend who had two puppies that he couldn't find a  home for.  Could I take one, he asked.  They were Jack Russel/Fox terrier hybrids.  Call me crazy but I love Jack Russel dogs. It wouldn't hurt to go look, I thought.

Well, our look see did hurt.  They were only six weeks old.  The tinier puppy looked just like the dad, a fox terrier and the other one looked like the mom, a Jack Russel.  Here's the thing...the owner would dump a can of dog food in a bowl and it was a free for all between the two tiny puppies and their parents.  Guess who would win...and guess who was getting beat up?  Ralph thought we could take the smaller puppy.  I looked at Ralph and asked him if he could find it in his heart to take the two...I couldn't leave the Jack Russel behind, she already had a big gash on her neck.

Well, if you know Ralph, you know he couldn't leave one behind.  Welcome, Punkin and Peggy Sue!  So next thing we now have five dogs.  Yes, it was a mad house but at the time Diana and Adri were still home and we couldn't have potty trained nor crate trained them without their help.

No one will understand, except another pet lover, what this amazing animals do for our soul.  They wrap around your heart like a warm blanket and kick start your heart with every lick and wag of their tail.

In the beginning of 2010, we'd walk Sugar and Gracie Lou down the 2nd street trail.  Since Punkin and Peggy Sue were too tiny, I'd carry them in a big green gingham baby bag.  We'd walk 3-4 miles a day.  Before you knew it, I was losing weight, something I'd been unsuccessful at for a while.  What a surprise!

A few months into 2010, both my daughters, Diana and Adri, move out.  Adri took Gracie Lou with her and is now my daughter's beloved companion.

Life progressed and over the next two years, they have been our constants.  On April Fool's day, 2012, one day after the hail storm of the century, our beloved Sandra D passed on and crossed the Rainbow Bridge.  We miss her dearly.

In October, 2012, Punkin fell ill and we found out it was an unusual parasite.  Sugar and Peggy Sue were unaffected.  It took three months for Punkin to recover.  Unfortunately, this parasite caused cells to develop a mass of some type and about six weeks ago, Punkin began getting sick, vomiting daily.  The vet gave her every test imaginable, confirmed the mass but we'd have to take her to a specialist animal hospital in San Antonio for further testing.  He told us more than likely the mass was malignant. Sadly, economically we're unable to handle the cost.

She was so sick, we had scheduled to put her down on May 1st but couldn't do it.  For ten days we made every effort to make her as comfortable as possible.  We kept praying hoping for the best but still no improvement.  By May 10th, we scheduled her again.  This time her original vet, Dr. Roge', saw her.  We asked what else could we do.  We didn't want to put her down.  All I know, is God must have been guiding this young veterinarian because the medications she chose and the care she gave has made a big difference in Punkin's quality of life.  The mass is not gone bu she's doing so much better.  God answered our prayers.  I'm still pray for a miracle for the mass to disappear.

I'm going to do a little back tracking.  Ralph and I were in a hit and run accident back in August, 2011.  It injured my feet and back and we went through extensive therapy for about eight months.  In those long eight months, I gained all the weight and then some that I had lost when we initially began walking.  Unable to regain my physical strength in my feet our walks had discontinued. With the help of an oscillating exercise machine, I've recovered a lot of my mobility but hadn't gone back to our walking.

In January, 2012, I almost lost my life from a reaction to medication I was taking for what I thought was the flu...it scared me so much, it  prompted me to make many changes.  One of them was getting back to walking our pets so I pushed myself to walk despite my injury. Now, as long as I walk on a level surface, I can walk daily and our puppies need to be walked. I went from 15 minutes on the treadmill to 1 hour daily and we walk our dogs every morning on the Bicentennial trail.  I've lost over 50 lbs. and feel so much better.

While it has been a combination of many things that have brought me to where I am today, looking back I realize our decision to save the two sets of puppies have been a Godsend.  I am so blessed to be able to walk them everyday and a blessing to care for them.  We may have thought we saved them...but I know they saved me.

Later...a picture of who I think are Peggy Sue's and Punkin's parents...found it on the wall of our pets animal care clinic...wait and see!!!








 

and the world turns...

When I first moved back to the Valley, I had the privilege and pleasure of attending Holy Spirit Catholic Church.  That was back in June, 1994.  I hadn't yet met Father Jerry Frank but he was definitely in my future.  I have always had premonitions even lucid dreams of my future and Father Jerry came to me in a dream.  In the dream, a man, a new incoming priest would be activating our community.  He and I wouldn't always see eye to eye but he was going to be a great teacher...my teacher.

At the time, it was exactly what I was looking for.  We had lived in Denver, Colorado, a progressive state where GREEN was being practiced long before it became an in word.  We moved back to Texas taking a slow 10-year tour through Houston, Longview, and finally landing in San Antonio and nowhere was Green being practiced in the state of Texas.  Now, we were headed for the Rio Grande Valley...????

I wasn't just looking for a environmental conscience community, I was looking for a well-rounded civic-minded conscientious community.  So we landed in McAllen.  Ralph and I dove in and became active in our daughter's schools, church and our community.

Father Jerry arrives.

Father Jerry introduced our church community to small church faith communities (CCFC).  We would have small groups of about 5 -15 people meet in an individual's home.  We would all take turns leading; one facilitator to keep us on task.  We prayed, cried, and laughed, sharing our joys and our pains.  It was a rough time and it was my small church community who saw me through so many of those low spots, kind of the way my Facebook community does for us now...at least my small FB family.

Many thought Father Jerry was way too political.  I have to admit, his politics did make me uncomfortable.  Yeah, he really was an advocate for voting in our community.  Let's face it, voting is not popular.  Back in 1994, out of the 160,059 registered, only 60,433 voted.  He said with our vote we could change anything.  Well, we hear that all the time...but do we know it.

Father Jerry was a man of action.  He chose facilitators for CCFCs' and we began training.  We learned about our one voice, one vote and how we could move mountains, literally.  He asked us to write our dreams for our community.  From that list we deleted, and tweaked the list until everyone was in agreement. The list was taken to homes, community and then our city.  The Rio Grande Valley Interfaith joined or we joined them...(they made me uncomfortable).  Before you knew it, everything on our agenda went through the process and it was put to a vote and well, what you see in McAllen is the result of that effort.  And when the city almost took our money marked for our libraries for the north and south and wanted to give it to STC, well,...Father Jerry showed us how to make the powers that be stick to what we voted for.

He even thought about our church staff who work years and have nothing in the form of retirement to show for it.  He unionized the church staff.  That's where the church finally drew the line and stepped in, sent Father Jerry away to another parish and fired four dedicated employees.  The rest is history.

He thought of the humblest of servants and stood up for us...the middle class of our church.   The change that followed his departure almost ended our beautiful church community.

(Celia Munoz Bazziomani, Mission High School, Class of 1970 alumni, began fundraising for a orphanage called Casa Amparo in Reynosa during this time.  It was through Holy Spirit Catholic Church that she connected Casa Amparo with our community.  Celia would raise monies for the orphanage through her summer BBQ and Rummage Sale held in September along with help from our church and community.  When Father Jerry was removed...Casa Amparo also suffered.)

I think back to that time.  President Clinton was president.  Our church kept telling us that it was a Jubilee year.  Well, Jubilee means total celebration in my eyes...and it was.  I really had jubilee in my heart.  But when Father Jerry was gone, it wasn't a jubilee, anymore.

I ask myself, "Did I support Father Jerry?  Did I help him?  Did I criticize him?  Did I thank him?  Most importantly, did I pray for him?  Did I pray for us?

After much thought, I came to the conclusion that I must not have prayed...
Obviously, I didn't....they took him away from Holy Spirit.


Thank you, Father Jerry Frank...

Days gone by...

One of my fondest memories growing up in Mission was driving through the Shary Estate in Sharyland, Texas.  Located northeast of Mission on Shary Road off Buddy Owens, John Harry Shary built the Shary Estate for his family.  Shary brought his family from Nebraska and settled  into Valley life while he blazed a trail through the citrus industry.  He had one daughter, Marialice, who married  Texas Govenor Allan Shivers.

Growing up, my dad worked for Allen Brun in Edinburg and sometimes we'd go pick him up.   My mom would take Shary Road.  At night it looked lonely and ominous and I loved that drive.  One Easter, our favorite spot was taken so Daddy had to drive around to find a spot.   We found ourselves driving down Shary Road.   It was the first time we had a real close up view in the daytime and what a sight it was!

Back then the orchards surrounding the estate had the tree tops completely leveled with each other.  I don't know who or how they did it but the tops were level and stood in perfectly straight diagonal lines.  Just before you reached the estate on the right (West) side was a beautiful garden with stairs leading down into a wide ravine-like area filled from side to side with beautiful manicured grass.  Palm trees and red bouganvillas accented small areas. As you drove by, the sudden drop on the right was so unexpected that by the time you reacted to the sight, you missed a quite different contrast on the left which was that of an enormous open pool surrounded by palm trees lined up straight up and down the sides.  It was a humongous reflection pool.

I remember that "drop" was also used for a panoramic photo taken of all the representatives of the different organizations and clubs at Mission High School. And my most memorable person...Robbie Sue Maloy, pictured with her drum major uniform was among the group of high school students.   Mission High School Class of 1966 Yearbook photo was awesome!  I couldn't wait to be in high school.

A little trivia to add to my memory; Linda Garza, Cynthia Garza Weber's sister, is also in the photo.  I hope I remembered this correctly.  Cynthia's dad, Eddie Garza, who graduated valedictorian of his class (Sharyland High School), worked for Shary Estates until his retirement.  I was always fascinated by Cynthia's knowledge of the building...there's even a bowling alley. To this day I've never been inside.

Shary Estates was also a part of our high school "Chicken!" dare games.  Rumors were that there was a ghost on the premises at night especially around the chapel where supposedly Shary folks were interned.  Turned out it was the night watchman who took care of the premises...but I found out John Harry Shary was buried in the small chapel!

Well, it's been some time now but if you haven't heard or read the news...UTPA couldn't pay for the upkeep and sold the Shary Estate.  The Monitor's Shary Estate Sold! tells of the new owner from Laredo, who plans to turn it into a unique events center of sorts.

I'm looking forward to seeing what they do.  Maybe they'll restore the grounds to their former glory. Maybe guided tours...I'd take it!

I feel about the Shary Estate the same way I feel about driving by Crystal Waters in Mission...I know the swimming pool is gone but in my eyes, I still see it in all its glory every time I drive by.

(And, no, I'm not delusional...lol!)