My mom got a letter in the mail letting her know that there would be a wreath ceremony on Saturday, December 11th at 11:00 a.m. at the Rio Grande Valley State Veteran's Cemetary. It was the 4th Annual Wreaths Across America laying of wreaths, placing over 100,000 wreaths on veteran's graves simultaneously at 300 locations across the United States and overseas.
It was the first I heard of it.
This has been a rather auspicious event. I have been mourning my father and I was using Advent to empty the grief I've been carrying or at least as much as I could in preparation of Jesus Christ's birth.
Ralph and I attended with my mom.
The day was semi-windy, perfect to hold up the weight of this magnificent flag.
It was well attended...
even Uncle Sam came.
While waiting my cousin, Joe and his family arrived. His youngest daughter was celebrating her 14th birthday that day. My Aunt Estella and my cousin Lisa were there too, honoring my Uncle Joe Corpus. Lisa graciously gave up her seat so my mom could sit down. Thanks, Lisa!
The procession began with riders from the South Texas Patriot Guard Riders and American Legion Riders escorting the trailer containing the wreaths.
Congressman Juan "Chuy" Hinojosa spoke to the crowd. Reminded all of us of the sacrifice our veterans gave yesterday, today, and tomorrow. He remembered Walter, Terry Lankford's brother...it made me smile. (No matter where I go, I will inevitably run into an "MHS-Class of 70" moment or classmate.)
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There was a 21 gun salute and high school ROTC platoon helped family members place wreaths at the veterans's gravesites. I got to place a wreath on my Dad's grave.
* * * *
Dad's been walking with me these last eleven days. I have cried more in these few days than in any period of my life. I finally figured it out. As hard as I tried to communicate with my father when I was younger - it always ended with "that's the way I am." It was hard to understand him, it made it harder to understand me.
And as hard as I tried forgiving, it became obvious, I had not. It wasn't until that last hour when we both knew there was no turning back. He asked me to forgive him. Everything seemed so transparent and suddenly I heard myself saying, "It's ok, Daddy. There's nothing to forgive." And that's when I realized...whatever stood between us was gone. Daddy looked straight into my eyes and I saw into my Dad's heart, and I knew I had a place...but now Daddy was gone.
Sadness fills me when I think of all the wasted time. I had tried so many times and thought at times I had succeeded in having the communication of a lifetime with my father. But each time it would go right back to the "way I am." I hadn't understood.
Now, it will have to be in spirit. I can still enjoy that love and forgiveness. I still miss you very much, Daddy.
* * * *
So this was the great detour....detours are like that. That's when God does what he does best. These last eleven days of Advent have been good. Advent has always been a time of focus for me. It is again.
Thanks to the Wreaths Across America for honoring my dad, Guadalupe Corpus and my Uncle Joe Corpus and all the veterans that rest at this beautiful resting place...and thanks to the veterans and their families for their sacrifices.
(I've been in a fog and slow blogging but it's getting better.)
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